CROSSROADS
01/31/2014
Have you ever struggled with a conflict in your life where you had to
choose something over another and which caused great suffering? You're probably
thinking right about now that this is a silly question and thinking to
yourself, “
Isn't this just part of the
human condition.” I agree wholeheartedly. Importantly though, this is a
blog post about the conflict of some individuals who identify as gay and
Christian, or maybe even some other particular faith, and who have difficulty
blending these parts of themselves. As many of you know, I work with a lot of
individuals who identity as gay and bisexual and/or gender variant and I have
heard many stories of how family and friends have rejected or abandoned them
for “coming out of the closet” or for being themselves; or vice versa, those
being scared to be who they are for fear of these things. Could you imagine
having this conflict? Most individuals find the task of blending one’s faith
and sexuality daunting and I think sometimes their resolve of this conflict is to
leave the church. Unfortunately, I see this more than I would like in my
practice. I believe it's disheartening that anyone would have to struggle in
blending their sexuality and faith, especially since sexuality and faith are
usually at the core of one's being. At this time, you're probably wondering
what I'm getting at. Although I don't identify with any particular religious denomination,
while working with these individuals lately, I have been reminded of a Bible verse
I've heard repeatedly. In Hebrews 13:8 it says, "
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Although
my explanation may not be elaborate here…I'm not a hermeneutic scholar so
please forgive me; nevertheless, this verse is simply saying that Jesus is the
same today as he will be any day and forever. You might ask how does this apply
to someone who is gay, bisexual, or gender variant? Interestingly, when people
"come out" sometimes others see these individuals as somehow changed. They are
still the same person they are today as they will be tomorrow; nothing per se
has changed about this individual except that they genuinely and authentically
own who they are. The way this person cares hasn't changed…the way this person
loves hasn't changed…ones ethics and morals hasn't changed. What does all this
mean? It means that the next time someone you know "comes out", understand that
nothing about this person has changed; they are still the person you know, the
person you love, and the person you care about. Interestingly, it's sort of a
paradox; although these individuals will be changed forever, they're still the
same person today, tomorrow, and the next. I think it takes a lot of courage
for someone to "come out" and to be authentic. Aristotle says, "
Courage is the first of human virtues because
it makes all others possible." If you're reading this, I en
Courage you to
find ways to also be authentic!
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Image courtesy of jscreationzs
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